CHAPTER 5

Visit to see Yukiko.

Because I had a car I started taking out Peter’s team to fundraise – I spoilt them with chocolates and bottles of pop – I was like the team leader.

Then Johann left and I decided that I would like to go to Germany to see Yukiko. I asked Peter if I could buy some prints and fundraise for my trip – he agreed. This could have been illegal because I was claiming welfare at the time – but it was fundraising for a charitable purpose. I raised several hundred pounds and Yukiko was pleased to hear that I was going to come to see her.

Because I was a purpose for whole type, I wanted a selfless motive for going to see Yukiko, which was a bit stupid – I could have gone just as a child goes to see his mother. So, I told Yukiko I wanted to give her an experience of God’s love as I felt it and she accepted this – she understood my giving attitude.

Before I left for Frankfurt a new centre leader took over from Peter. His name was George. I remember he gave a talk on his personal sin and how it led to an embarrassing skin condition – pustules. I knew he was aiming the sermon at me, saying This is how to do it. But, I was just bored silly. All I wanted to hear was How are we going to build a better world not a boring pointless talk on personal sin. I couldn’t understand how talking about personal sin will build a better world. I had tunnel vision – all I wanted hear about was building a better world. On reflection this was a wrong attitude.

It was Summer 1983 or 84 and I caught the train and then a ferry across the Channel, then another train to Cologne.

It was beautiful sunny weather. I caught a tram to the outskirts of town and then hitched a lift to an autobahn service station. There were lots of people trying to hitch-hike there so I decided I’d walk into town. Very strangely I met a young English couple on an isolated path and I asked where I could get a bus, so they told me and I caught a bus to Weisbaden and then I telephoned Yukiko and caught a train to Frankfurt.

When I arrived Yukiko was waiting and she ran to me as if to give me a hug but I rejected her, I remembered how hard shed been on me with Jenny and Eric.

So, we went to the European HQ which was where she was working and we had a bite to eat. The spirit world was strong there – I felt it – very pure.

I was invited to a meeting with President Kim. He was sat on a chair and all the members were sat around on the floor. I was very excited – the spirit world was very strong. He was picking people to sing – I was praying Pick me! Pick me! I was very inspired by the powerful, good spirit world in the room.

That night was a Saturday night and it was Pledge (a special prayer of dedication) the following morning at 5am. I was sharing a room with a Korean lad. He made a right performance of sleeping arrangements, I didn’t care I dived into the top bunk. Erm, I didn’t consider myself to be an A member and a dedicated follower of the movement, what I didn’t want to happen was to be forced to conform rather than a genuine belief out of my free will. So I had no intention of doing the Pledge prayer ceremony at 5am, so I didn’t get up, much to the annoyance of my Korean buddy.

The next morning Yukiko told me that the HQ was a special centre and that I would have to go and stay in the Annex centre in town – I was being kicked out because I didn’t do pledge. So, we did that. The Annex was not as spiritually blessed as the HQ. The leader was a German called Robert. There was a Japanese lad there called Gen.

When I was walking in town near the HQ Yukiko and I bumped into President Kim. He warmly shook my hand. I was told that this is a very rare honour. I believe that the reason he accepted me was because I was a Purpose for Whole type and not a selfish Purpose for Individual type like most Western people. Korean’s are a bit wiser than most nations and they are aware that Westerners are basically selfish beauty types and they shouldn’t be given a subject position.

As luck would have it, President Kim was hosting a 3 Day Workshop in the countryside. Yukiko got me an invite off President Kim and we went.
The weather was blue skies and strong sunshine. Yukiko and I were very, very pleased to be together. The atmosphere was strong and it was time for renewal for all.

Yukiko left me for a while and then for some reason I found myself sitting next to George from the Liverpool centre. George was highly suspicious and critical, he leaned his leg into mine and asked Who had invited me? I said President Kim and he scowled off. He wanted to get me kicked off the workshop.

I sat with Yukiko on the floor of a huge barn with maybe 1,500 other members as President Kim spoke. But some peculiar things happened:-

Firstly, I thought I was more inspired than President Kim, I can’t say any more than that! President Kim was blessed by a good spirit world but I felt more in tune with this Holy Spirit than him.

And secondly, I had some spiritual energy trouble – I was starting to get this problem and in this intense atmosphere it was more evident. An Oriental girl was sat in front of me and I could feel a spirit element coming from my penis going into her. Imagine you had a huge pot of water and a valve at the bottom of the pot and the pressure was forcing the valve to leak. It was just like that. In Christianity, there is the concept that the Holy Spirit is an Everlasting Water that dwells within us.

Yukiko and I had a great time – it refreshed our bonding. So, we returned to Frankfurt and we saw each other every day.

There was yet another problem with the toilet arrangements in my centre.

There was the one toilet for maybe 16 people. I managed to solid waste excrete on one occasion but the smell filled the room! After that I tried again but people kept on trying to open the door so I gave up.

But once when I was in town I came across a modern clean toilet block, so I went in there, no problem. When I came out I met the centre leader Robert. He was sort of ‘glad you found these toilets’, but I thought How cruel can you be because you never told me? Is this the level of your love when you are in the centre of a religion, religion teaches us how to give and be kind? I didn’t understand it at the time but he was a Way of Beauty type. He wanted me to wait for him whilst he used the toilet – I didn’t wait, I went home.

When he came home he asked me why I didn’t wait. I told him, I don’t like you.